Eight years ago, when Colt was eleven years old, he made a decision not to date, until he was certain he had met the right girl. Actually, he didn't actually call it dating. It would be a courtship when he met the right one. Courtship with the intent on it being the girl he would one day marry.This was based on a philosophy that he had been raised with: don't waste your time, money, but most importantly, your heart, chasing girls. Keep your heart for the girl that you believe you will spend the rest of your life with. Make friends and get to know people - both guys and girls. Spend time with friends and get to know them. Have fun. Know what you want in a future partner. But don't throw away your heart and your purity over frivolous relationships.
Another important part of this was guarding the hearts of the girls that he knew. He and his brothers were raised with the understanding that they treat girls like young ladies and respect them, knowing that one day these girls would be somebody else's wife.
We taught Colt that there were things that needed to be done before he would be ready to think about supporting a wife. One of these things was he needed to get his life together, and so over the last eight years, my husband taught him a trade, and Colt established for himself a wonderful reputation with everyone he has worked with, and through hard work he has built a bank account and paid for a car.
Over the years, when girls came along and showed an interest in Colt, I would ask him if he was still certain that he was committed to waiting and courtship. He always said he was. And then one day he met Tyler.
Their friendship began through the Cadet Corp Camp, which takes place every summer in a town far from either of our homes. After a couple encounters at camp, phone numbers were exchanged, and there began a long-distance telephone and texting friendship. Over the months that passed, these hundreds of hours of simply talking sparked a sweet romance that began last spring. They discussed everything important to each of their futures: hopes and dreams, what they wanted from life, how they were raised, careers, goals, what they believed in, and so many more important things.
The wonderful thing about this is how much was talked about with no compromise and nothing else getting in the way. It wasn't until six months later that they came face to face for the first time, since camp. By now, they knew so much about each other. What an uncomplicated way to begin a relationship.
Over the course of the next nine months, with Colt living in a town nearby, they spent time getting to know each other further. Their time together was shared by Tyler's best friend and her boyfriend, who became a very good friend of Colt's. Colt and Tyler continued to be committed to purity and a Godly relationship.
Colt talked to me about how he felt that Tyler was The One. As time went by, he felt this more and more. One day, he told me that he wanted to give her a Promise Ring. This may be a trendy thing to do, but in our family this holds great significance. This is Colt's pledge to remain pure and keep his heart for Tyler. After he had my blessing, Colt had a visit with Tyler's dad, and asked his permission to give Tyler the ring. Her father thought they were young, but knew it was not an engagement ring; it was a ring showing commitment, and thereby agreed to the ring.
One year (and one day) after they met, on March 23rd, Colt gave Tyler a promise ring. They both have plans for the next couple years with regard to their educations, and so they don't really know what the future holds, but they do know that they are committed to each other.
People will say they are young, and honestly, I really believed that myself in the beginning. I have since come to realize that who am I to say they are too young? I am going to believe the best for them. I have a number of fine examples of young love that has remained true for 30 + years! These marriages all began when they were seventeen - nineteen years of age. Each of them is still very much in love and have produced wonderful families.
I have met Tyler and think she is a wonderful young lady. She has many interests and some of these include children, travel, art, and she is also a very skilled soccer goalie. She is hoping to go to college and get her Early Childhood Education diploma in the near future. Having spent time chatting with Tyler, I can see how much she loves Colt, and that she is supportive of him joining the military.
I am very proud of Colt, and believe he is a fine example of a man of faith, integrity, hard work, loyalty and responsibility. He really loves Tyler, and therefore, I pray for only the best for her and Colt in their future.
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5 comments:
how wonderful to hear that they are still committed to their faith, their goals, and each other. She seems like a good match for him. I guess only time will tell but as I watch my nieces and nephews getting married these past few years, many of them met their spouses when they were in their teens and now have wonderful marriages.
You know, I met my husband when I was 18 and he was 19. We, too, had a long-distance friendship to start, and we got married when we were both 21. Fourteen years later, we're happy as a couple of clams.
It's true that some elements of marriage are more challenging when the couple is very young. We struggled with things, then, that wouldn't have been an issue if we had been more mature. But we believed (and still do) that God had brought us together and that marriage was His plan for us. We are so happy together, and wouldn't have had it any other way!
I hope things go well for Colt and Tyler; it sounds like they're a great team!
Congratulations Colt and Tyler. Even though I was one of those that got married at 19 and will be celebrating 45 years this December I commend you for waiting a little longer until you get married. The world is changing and you will face more challenges so getting your training and education first is a very wise decision.
This is so wonderful to hear Justine! Congrats to both of them. The hard work & time they put into it now will pay off in building a solid foundation. Getting a career first is so very smart, and was one of the first pieces of advice I ever got from my father!
SO awesome!!!
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