Again Names

I have gone back and forth on posting this conversation for a while. You know, when you are read by people of all different opinions and not just friends who know you, you can be a little cautious of posting your thoughts for fear of reprisal. Well, I decided to go ahead because I have always been upfront and candid and I am not about to stop now. I have two things to blog about. They will be in separate posts. The first is names and here we go.

When we brought the girls home, if you remember, we went back and forth on their names: did we give them names, did we use their birth names, or did we use both, or what?!

When you get out in the adoption world and listen to other people speak on this topic, you will hear a lot of variation, but one thing you will notice is that most people are very strong in their beliefs in why they choose what they do.

I can no longer say that I am strong about my opinion/belief on this topic. I actually never was! LOL!! We finally settled that we would keep the girls' birth names as their first names as a gift to their mother. But then sometime after Mesai came home from Ethiopia (weeks) she was told in full her new name: Mesai Raine Ayana and she liked it. She loved it. She loved the Ayana part and when she would say her name she was always sure to put the Ayana on it because she loved that it meant "Beautiful Flower".

She told me she wanted to be called Raine and I heard her, but did nothing about it. We were going anywhere and there was no immediate hurry and perhaps she would change her mind. So we continued to call her Mesai. But then we went to Sunday School and she informed me that she wanted to tell the kids her name was Raine. So we did.

When the children asked what her sister's name was, I was in a position. Did I say Gadisae or Song Savannah? So I told them that the girls had two names: their Canadian names and their Ethiopian names. Typical of children they just accepted this and went about their business.

Time went by, and we kept pretty much to our family at home and church, so the girls didn't have a lot of chance to try out their new names. So we continued calling them Gadisae and Mesai. But every so often, Mesai would say, "I want to call Raine."

Finally, we made a decision to begin attending a new church (part time). They have a fabulous children's program(s) and teen ministry and since we have so many kids we felt it would be best for the children. Well, the first day we went Mesai made sure she was Raine, but our *children* are used to calling her Mesai, so they kept stumbling over the names.

That was the turning point for us. We had to get serious about listening to Mesai and begin using Raine with a real effort. The girls like Savannah and Raine, and so we are using both, but we are focussing on the Canadian names. Raine likes the little word picture I give her of the "Raine" falling on the "Savannah" and beautiful flowers and food grows for the Ethiopians. It is symbolic for me and 'nice' for her. But honestly, I am following her lead.

She will always be Mesai and Gadisae will always be Gadisae, but they will be known now as Raine and Savannah. And when they are older they will be familiar with both names and *they* can make the choice of which name they want to use.
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