Sitting on the Edge of the Nest - Part 3

So how does all these posts have anything to do with Sitting on the Edge of the Nest?

Well, I believe from watching my two older boys that that is just what they are doing for those final two to three years of highschool. They are sitting on the edge of the nest, dying to jump off and try to fly, but yet, they can't really because there are safety harnesses holding them back. They have these 'obligations' to do what is expected of them, versus being trusted to know what is best for themselves!

By allowing them to make decisions regarding their education based on what they think they want to learn, rather than choosing from a prescribed list of choices, I believe is a way of allowing them to fly.

Following is the beginning of me learning to do this:

In September of last year, I signed our newest grade 10 student up for classes through two distance education programs. We began the year with the typical: English 10, Math 10, Science 10. He was also given some 'easy' credits through Info Tech (computer) 10, PE 10.

At one point, I threatened him with public school if he didn't start buckling down and do this work.

It wasn't that he wasn't doing the work; he was simply was hating it and bothering those around him. It had absolutely no relevance to his life. He said he had no plans to do anything with the Shakespeare and poetry and analyzing short stories that he was doing; and he had no interest in chemistry, physics and earth science. So what was the point?

I had put off Social Studies 10 with plans to incorporate it into the next semester. As January drew to a close, and I had to make some decisions regarding the next semester with Dane, I realized that I was really not at peace with his sitting down for the next 2.5 years doing what the government wanted versus *really learning*.

So we had a talk.

I wasn't completely 'there' yet; I was still on the journey.

First step: we would challenge the Grade 10 Home Economics course, and see if he could do some of the work and get credits for what he had done at home. He has been cooking and baking in the kitchen, since he was nine years old. He would write his own Aviation course and get four credits for that; and he would continue in Work Experience in Construction, since he had plenty of chances to do that, plus he would continue his English 10 course through to June.

(So you see, I was still worrying about the mandatory 80 credits for graduation). This way I could give him a 'real' transcript even if he didn't go for the provincial special diploma.

So, he wrote a program for Aviation: he would paint a mural on his bedroom wall of a World War II fighter plane, read through the Ground School Course textbook on flight and apply each lesson to his Flight Simulator computer program (read the lesson and carry out the lesson in reality), plus he would get credit for a World War II story that he wrote about a soldier from our country that lay down his life for some children in the war.

Early February, he began his courses.

About five weeks into the program, I was visiting a friend - the friends in the Wilderness Blessing post. We began talking about teens, attitudes, pestering little siblings, restlessness, and lack of interest in mundane courses. And WHAT TO DO!?

The first thing I heard was to 'Build his confidence'. This is different to self-esteem, which can be 'all about me.' This is showing a boy that is ready to conquer the world that *he can*. He does not have to jump through certain hoops to keep the system happy anymore. Let him know that he can do things. Practical skills. Follow his passions. Give him things to do that show him that he is not just a student - but a man ready to take on the world.

As I sat there listening, I began to get ideas. My sister was there with me that day, and she told me that that was the way I had raised the children always, why was now any different?

FEAR was my only answer!

So no more fear!

Dane does not want to go to university or college. He wants to be a pilot. For this occupation he does not need even a highschool transcript. A transcript is the paper with the marks on it. The diploma is a certificate that shows what school he came from. A child coming from England is going to have a different set of marks than we would have in Canada! That child will not be stopped from going to university - they would have to take the entrance exam and prove they are capable! I know this, as my brother graduated in England!

To be a pilot he needs to take his pilot's license and then to move up higher, he simply needs experience on the smaller planes.

But most importantly, a student never just enters higher education - they have to take entrance exams. How many homeschool students don't have the 'government written' graduation diploma, but have gotten into university, simply by taking the entrance exam and receiving flying colours? Many, many, many!

I always knew this was true, but once again, I was scared of taking an 'unconventional' route.

When I came home from my friend's that day, I felt liberated! The following day I felt I got confirmation. I received an email from Dane's Home Ec teacher, who he had been submitting work to for the previous five weeks, and was told that Dane had successfully challenged the course and would not need to finish the following three months work!

One less obligation. More room to work with his interests. He soon finished his Work Experience obligations and has now only got English to finish, plus his Aviation course, which he is enjoying.

So now, I had the time I needed to put the boy to work! *smile*

The next day, while he was 'officially' off on his own schedule (no more my scheduling) he came downstairs and told me there was a blocked drain and could he use the internet. He wanted to find out how to remove the blocked plug. I was pleased to see that once this boy was no longer tied to the desk all day, he had time to begin doing things that would better equip him when he left home! He found the solution and solved the problem. A successful bonus to his first 'free day'.

At the same time, I figured it was time he had more space to call his own. His big brother already had a room of his own, and though I am very against children having their own rooms, as I believe it breeds selfishness, I thought it was time for some new lessons in this newly turned 16 year old.

We began by moving out his bed to the recroom. At first he wasn't so sure. He felt a bit lonely. And so for about a week or so, he slept more in the house than outside. By the following week, he had tried it more and quickly decided he loved having his own space.

Taking His Bed Apart and Moving Out

Brotherly Help

Moved Into the 'Men's Barracks'

to be continued - Part 4
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Homeschooling - for Natasha

Natasha,

I am going to quote what you said and respond to you. *smile*

"I often think I would be a homeschooler if I had other women/parents to do it with. If there was a home school co op or something. I just really believe in the whole village raising a child and think I would burn out doing it on my own. Plus my kids are, so far, really happy in school. Your post sure makes me think though."

When I began homeschooling it was with absolutely no support. I knew of homeschoolers, but knew noone personally. I had always fully intended on my children being in public school. I had no reason to not send them to school, and I was looking forward to being the perfect public school mother: I would bring cupcakes for birthdays, help on parent helper days, do fieldtrips, and anything else that came along. I was going to be Beaver Cleaver's mother!

Something changed in me one day. My son was about 4 years old, and I so adored him. I couldn't imagine someone else getting to spend all those wonderful hours with him, while I would only have the pleasure of his company, while getting ready for school, and then later, bed.

It didn't take much to sway me to homeschool. I had friends whose children went to public school, but the fact that they didn't homeschool didn't deter me. We still had all our previous interests in common, and our children liked each other. We continued to visit after school and on weekends.

I linked up to the local homeschool group, and trust me, in your town there will be a support group. Here is a list of support groups in Saskatchewan.

Even though I was hooked up with the support group, I didn't connect with a bunch of people, because I didn't feel the need. I had my own regular friends, and I was not looking for a new crowd. But one day, I met this lady with a large family. I was drawn to her because of her amazingly beautiful family. They had eight children that ranged from two to sixteen years, with two adopted from Haiti. We chatted a few times and kept up occasional visits, when she could find time in her very busy life.

This encouraged me in my homeschool walk. But that year, with little other support, I began the 'typical' homeschool walk. I went to a curriculum fair and bought Abeka textbooks and thus, began my first year of homeschool. I set up my classroom with desks, and posters on the wall, and cute little stamps that said 'Well done'.

The funniest thing is that that was the era for 'school at home' versus 'home learning', which is where most of us have evolved to. So, the next thing I did was join a friend in buying 'school clothes' for our nice little uniforms. They had little blue slacks, blue cardigans, and white shirts - so when we went on field trips, we would look official. Can you imagine!

Thank goodness, things have changed! And thankfully, that only lasted for a year.

A year after I began, I had burned out my 6 year old son with textbooks and expectations, and neither of us was too thrilled about continuing. He was wanting to go to school, simply because his friends did. I was just hanging in there until he turned eight. I figured if he was home til he was eight, then he would have a strong self-esteem and be able to put up with all the bullying and schoolyard behaviours.

Then life took a surprising change of course.

I heard about a homeschool book called Homeschool Burnout by Raymond and Dorothy Moore. It has since been renamed a better name: The Successful Homeschool Handbook. I loved the book and felt recharged. I then read some of the other books they had: Better Late Than Early and Home Grown Kids - a practical guide to teaching your children at home.

These books changed my life. After reading them, I decided I would no longer take the 'drill it' textbook approach; we would begin to love learning. I did a search on the internet and found the Five In A Row curriculum. That was the beginning of a new way of life for us. From that moment on, I never again said I would put my children in school at age eight. My new statement was: We will homeschool as long as God calls us to it.

We were now "Lighting a Fire" rather than "Filling a Bucket". A whole new approach.

So, how does this answer your post, Natasha? You said you would homeschool if you had other women/friends to do it with. You are such a friendly, sweet person, that you would have no trouble making friends in the local coop!! I know that you will have at least one support group in your area. Even in our tiny area we have a small one. All it takes is one friend on the same page to support and encourage you!

I want to show you though, that even if that is not possible, there are other ways of getting support, if your heart is in it. While I met that one family and thought they were wonderful, I didn't connect with others. I was too busy in my little world.

But then, after I read the Moore's book and did a search on the internet for homeschooling sites, I came across the Five In A Row site, as I mentioned before. Well, God works in mysterious ways because it ended up that I would meet two of my best friends on that site!

It had just one message board at the time (and now there are many) and there were not many people hanging out on it. I spent the next few weeks reading every single post I could in the archives to get a real feel for how that curriculum worked. Before I ordered the curriculum I wanted to really know what I was getting myself in for, and the more I read, the more excited I got. This approach was so different from anything I had been exposed to up to this point. And by reading the posts I got to 'know' the different people on the boards and it became a really personal place for us all.

One day, I made mention of having found a pair of tiny blue boots in the toilet. They were placed there by my sweet little 10 month old baby boy. One girl responded and we began corresponding and we found we had so much in common. That was my good friend, Denise. Though she lives thousands of miles away, it hasn't mattered. We have both taken holidays to have our visits. For the last eleven years we have had an amazing friendship. She is my closest confidant, and a friend I cannot imagine life without. We have spent hundreds of hours on the phone and supported each other through years of homeschooling decisions, ups and downs, trials and joys.

At the same time, I met another girl on the boards. She was different though. She had seven children and had things going on in her life that I wanted; things I hadn't achieved and some I didn't think I would ever achieve; as in seven children! The jokes on me! *grin*. She was homeschooling in ways that I hadn't even known were possible. She opened my mind to Charlotte Mason's theories of home-learning.

The ironic thing was this it turned out that this lady lived in my own town! One day we finally set up a meeting, and we were both quite nervous! It was something when we discovered that we both had little boys about to turn seven years old on the very same day! Then we found out they had both been born at the same hospital! And to think we had met through a Missouri, Kansas website. What 'chance' of that? Renee quickly became another one of my closest friends. Though we haven't been able to see each other for years because both of us moved (her - across the country), our hearts are forever connected. She is my inspiration and a true sisterchick!

(Definition: Someone who knows the deepest wonders of your heart, loves you like a sister, and provides a reality check when you're being a brat.)

When we moved to our present location, I knew *noone* that homeschooled. It wasn't for another three years that I knew anyone in our town that did!! I was a solo flyer, but when you homeschool, you get so involved in teaching your children that you are busy - busier and more creative than you have ever been!! And it is not lonely! You get to know your children in ways you never realized you would before.

So, I didn't miss having a local group. But I always had my two close friends, because you see, they were at the end of the telephone and the email, plus I had the message board of people at the Five in a Row website, who were doing the same curriculum as I was, and they were like an extended family/support group.

You would be amazed where your friendships will come from in the homeschool world!

So, you see, though I got the local support from a support group and meeting other homeschoolers, my real support came from heart connections I made that were long distance

And regarding your last comment about your children being happy at school: Often times, mums get the idea to homeschool and the kids want to stay in school. That is not unusual! I have a friend who brought her daughter home when she was in grade two, and it took her a long while to convince her daughter that being at home was better than being in school.

This little girl had so many friends that she felt that being at home was taking that away from her. That is a very valid point. But the other side of the coin is that when the children are at school they are not forging strong relationships with their siblings. I am so glad to see that my children have those hours to create lasting bonds with each other.

But eventually, when the children begin to see all the things that they are able to do at home, since they are not in a classroom, they are drawn home. There is no reason that a child needs to lose their public school friends either. They simply go to different schools and can play after school hours or weekends.

I hope this has encouraged you, whether you decide to keep public schooling or homeschool. You have to do what your heart calls you to and with a mum like you, Natasha, your children will thrive anywhere.
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Sitting on the Edge of the Nest - Part 2

When I visited with my 2nd cousin in California a couple years ago, I discussed our oldest son with her. I told her of his difficulties in school, and then I told her of all his amazing strengths and brilliant mind.

(Yet, it was a mind that did not fit neatly into a school classroom type workstyle, but that did not make it dumb, just different.)

You know what she said to me?

"He is the type of student that I was looking for." This lady (now in her 70s) was a world-renowned cardiopathologist (and still gives her speeches around the world) and was the Dean of Admissions at Stanford University! She told me that "A's" were not what they were after. During their interview with hopeful students, they were looking for the young people that asked the questions and then tried to solve the problems. A mere "A" did not ensure the student a placement in Stanford University! What confirmation that I needed to follow my child's interests!

Sadly though, years and years of conditioning, caused me to go home and continue on the same weary path. We got the curriculum from the public schools (Distance Education and then later, enrolled him for one year in the local highschool) and began to follow the system. He is nearly at the end of this journey and it has been hard. At times I feel overwhelmed with grief at the joy that he lost due to never being able to get through schoolwork in a normal length of time. How much time he lost to just trying to get done.

Whereas, if I had let him learn in his own style and not worried about the future so much, he might have been the next great inventor of something incredible. I surely believe that! As it is, I know this boy. I was watching a movie: Annapolis the other night, and I saw this one young man that had come from a hard life. He was determined to get through the bootcamp. Only the best made it through this program. It was for the Navy and it was tough! As I watched this young man outlast and outdo the other cadets, I said to my husband, "That is Colt!"

And that IS my son! He is the best at anything he puts his mind to. Today, for instance, he was sent outside to stack logs, as a break from school, because during school his mind was off doing things with lighters and wax and 'dangerous boy stuff'. *smile* I looked out the window and though he is not thrilled to be out there, I turned to my husband and said, "Typical Colt. His stack is perfect." He had a system and even though he was irritate to be sent to do this, he embraced it and did it perfectly. He does everything in full measure and is highly respected in the community because of it!

To show you who this boy is, let me tell you something. Colt is in the Army Cadets, and each year they pick the top 20 physically fit cadets in each province to try out for the week-long "Pre-Para" elimination round.

The real "Para" is a military program where the best cadets from across our country get to train with the top military men in a Paratrooping course. There are twenty cadets in each province and they compete at "Pre-Para" for one week, and from those twenty, only five are chosen to train in the six week military paratrooping course in the summer. Colt finished in 6th place. He was told that if one person drops from the course he will be taking their spot. So a couple weeks ago, he was gone for 24 hours. He was flown by the military from our town to the Big City to have his medical testing all done. This is so that he will be ready if he gets a last minute call. (As an aside: While there, he discovered that he was almost deaf in one ear!!! We had never known. A tiny bit more and he would not have been able to qualify. On the other hand, his other ear was above average!)

So, for those of you who have read Colt's history, this is the boy that received the Obstacle Award three years ago, because he so struggled with written work and yet, had managed to move up levels in Cadets and had begun public school.

Fast forward to now: he is the head cadet in his corp, teaching as many as three lessons in an evening. Lessons that used to take him weeks to prepare. He, like any smart kid with a learning disability, has figured out ways around his difficulties. The challenges have not disappeared, but he has worked the system, so he can do what he has to, while not being overwhelmed. On the contrary: I get comments from his officers about how exemplary and outstanding he is. And I know this is true!

He will graduate in 2 months and then is hoping to enter the military as a pilot.

So what have I learned from all this? To not push a child in a direction he is not meant to go. And to listen to his heart and his interests. But most importantly, to not fear the system, the future, or what others think he should be doing.

This child has always been goal driven - ever since I can remember! School did not push him into the military - his passion for moving up the levels in Cadets helped him get over his problems and caused him to strive for what he wants from his future. The military is just another avenue for reaching the top. I believe that that boy will make a fine officer one day, and only I will know the odds he has overcome to get there!

I believe each child is gifted with desires of their hearts and abilities and interests. If we just listen to them we might end up where they want to be versus where we think they need to be.

A prime example of following a child's heart versus following a so called mandatory curriculum to graduate is my own history:

When I was in highschool I took all the mandatory classes: Social studies, science, english, math, and more. The classes I chose to take were: every creative class and family study class that was available. My favourite work experience: working in a preschool.

All through my life I was drawn to children. I left school and got a job as a nanny for a short while, worked in a hotel babysitting for children, and worked in a hospital in a special baby unit as a housekeeper in England.

When I settled and had my first child, I began taking the Early Childhood Education courses to get my teaching diploma. I didn't need anything fancy to take this course. There was no highschool graduation requirement!

I simply needed to take a Composite Test and pass it, plus pass the interview. These requirement still stand today! I was a C to C+ student in school, except for the Arts, where I scored A's and B's. When I took the Early Childhood Education course, I did not receive a mark below a B. I was doing something that I had a passion for and it shown in my drive and determination.

Since taking that course, my husband and I built a preschool centre/daycare and opened for business. My centre was open for a number of years, before I felt that raising my own children and teaching them was more important that teaching someone else's children.

And as far as my Arts and Creativity go - I have never stopped being creative! It is an ongoing angle of homeschooling and raising children and building houses!

The irony of me writing a blog is that I never enjoyed English and did a poor job in class, just passing. What caused me to be able to spell and write and use grammar relatively well? Well, when I was 17 years old I wrote a book. This book happened because I was a Little House on the Prairie fan from when I was eight years old. Laura was my 'best friend' and I wanted to be just like her (when I was little). When I was older I wanted to write a book (and I had never written before!) about that time zone. I borrowed my mother's old typewriter and began plunking away. During school, I had taken a 4 month typing course in school, where of course, I had received a C type grade. Why? Because I had no interest in sitting at a typewriter typing mindless letters and words!

But typing this book was different. It was a topic that I was excited about. It caused me to want to learn to type. The book ended up being over 150 pages long and I still have it. After that, I never wrote again. But then when I got a computer, about 18 years later, I began typing and I learned to do it quickly. I realized as I wrote letters to my friend in Tennessee that I wrote in a narrative form - it was my own style. We wrote hundreds and hundreds and hundreds! of pages back and forth to each other. And from there, I began to blog about three years ago. Simply a continuation of my letter writing.

So you see, the English student, I was not - the narrative writer, I am. I have a passion for what I write about and it makes writing a fulfilling and enjoyable pass-time.

And my passion for mothering children? Well, it followed me from my preschool years right to now where I have two times the children I ever dreamed I would have!

Each of those mandatory courses that I had to take in highschool were not courses that I have pursued in my future! I could not understand Business Math in highschool and got a C -, and yet, I have been doing the business books for the last twenty years for my husband's construction company. In grade 9 there was nothing the teacher could do to get me to understand Algebra, and now I am quite easily understanding it as I teach it to my grade 9/10 sons! As I needed it, I learned it!

I believe I am a case in point of following a student's interests and not worrying about filling the requirements that a government needs to so-called 'graduate'. There are *many* forms of graduation and the government diploma is only one of them!

To be continued in Part 3
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Over-Analyzing Adopted Children (or Bio!)

There has been recent discussion in the adoption word about over-analyzing behaviours in the adopted children. I am famous for that. But then, I am famous for that in my bio-children! Yes, at first when the girls came home I saw every little issue as a mountain, because who knows what is behind the behaviour and if I don't deal with it, what will it turn into?' So I tended and still tend to deal with things the minute they arise.

My theory is that I do not want to let something slide through that I will regret later and then have to reparent them later on. For instance, if a child disobeyed me, I would deal with it. I could cut slack because they are adopted, but why is that any different than cutting slack because my child has Down Syndrome or has a learning disability? A child that disobeys needs correction.No matter who the child is or where they have come from. If I was to let it go because 'they are adopted' then I know that later, when they are 'comfortably settled in', I would be readdressing this issue and dealing out consequences. Is that fair to the child?

I do not believe so. I deal with an issue when it arises because I believe the child needs to feel the security of knowing that there are boundaries and they are treated equally to our bio-children. I have seen the results of this. The girls are secure and know what is expected of them. There will be no back-tracking behaviours in our house, because nothing has changed since they arrived. My expectations have always been the same. And yes, it might seem that things were a little strict in the beginning because of this.

So because of having this attitude, I was/am an overanalyzer - but that is my personality type! *smile* And we do not know what our children have come from and what baggage they bring. And yes, this might colour how they behave.

I think that because I have raised my other children from birth I know them better. I know how much slack I can cut them, because I know it is a momentary issue that we are dealing with, or I know it is a real heart issue - such as lying - that I will *not* cut slack on, because that particular child might have a history of that. And so I will handle the situations according to who this child is and what I know of their heart.

With our adopted children it is different. We do not know their hearts. We have not raised them from babyhood. We are not aware if something is a minor sin or if it is a deep-rooted heart issue that they have dealt with for years! And because of this, we approach each situation as an unknown and simply parent it the way we would with a child that was born to us. As I correct one of our girls, I am open to the idea that perhaps there is more to the picture than meets the eye, but that is where being open-minded and being willing to learn and change comes in. It is a constant evolution, as I always say! But as a rule, I parent them with the exact expectations I have for our boys.

Recently, though, when I was struggling with expecting the same cooperation and behaviours from Savannah, as Raine, I had an inspiration. I give God the credit because I was praying for the girls and really wanted what was best for them. Think about if you have two birth children. You have probably delivered these two babies a year or two apart. Therefore, your expectations are different. Obviously, one is a year advanced on the second.

I was struggling because I had brought these two children into my home the same day, but things weren't progressing as I 'expected'. To be honest, one child was performing wonderfully, and one was a lot more work. It wasn't that she was mean, nasty, or any such thing. It was simply that she required so much more teaching and guidance in getting things done, getting her motivated, having her understand what I was saying, speaking very delayed English, not doing her chores neatly, quickly, or willingly.

While at the same time, her sister was quick to do her work, did it neatly, was always willing to help out, speaks and understands 95% of what I say, and acts like she has been in Canada 6 months longer than her sister!

As a parent, I was finding it frustrating at times. I know it is not the girls' fault; it is my expectations! I really believe the girls are only 12 months apart in age. Savannah surprised us the other day by losing her first tooth, a week behind her older sister. And then, while I was brushing Savannah's teeth the other day, I discovered that she has three of her six year molars! There goes the four year old theory!! *laugh* Developmentally, Savannah is about 4-5 years old, while Raine is about 6-7 years. This just goes to show you that age, teeth, size mean *nothing*!!!!

So as I was saying, in my frustrated moments, I was praying for understanding and patience of this child. Suddenly, an idea popped into my head. I knew I had a book that talked about Personality Types. I ran looking for it and it really inspired me with what I discovered. After re-reading this book, (which I had read years ago, but not even thought of in regard to our adopted children) I really believe that personality has a lot to do with how these children respond, and it is not all adoption related!!

First, I shall show how these personality types work for those that don't know:

Have you heard about the 'Personality Types'? There are various ways of explaining them. I have written the different choices in the same order for each set:

Powerful, Popular, Peaceful, Perfect.

Lion, Otter, Golden Retriever, Beaver.

Dominant, Influential, Steady, Conscientious.

Choleric, Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Melancholy

The book that I have reading on this topic uses the terms: Choleric - the Powerful Personality (red hot like a fire); Sanguine - the Popular Personality (bright yellow like the sun); Phlegmatic - the Peaceful Personality (cool green like the grass); Melancholy - the Perfect Personality (deep blue like the ocean).

This book discusses the personalities in depth and this is some of the character traits from each person:

Choleric - the Powerful Personality

The Extrovert / The Leader

Child

STRENGTHS

Daring and eager

Productive worker

Sees the goal

Moves quickly

Self-sufficient

Competitive

Assertive

Trustworthy

WEAKNESSES
Manipulative

Temper-tantrums

Constantly going

Insistent

Testing

Arguing

Stubborn

Teen

STRENGTHS

Aggressive

Competent

Organizes well

Assumes leadership

Problem solver

Self-confident

Stimulates others

Excels in emergencies

Great potential

Responsible

WEAKNESSES

Too bossy

Controls parents

Knows everything

Looks down on dummies

Unpopular

May be a loner

Insulting

Judgemental

Unrepentant

Emotional Needs: appreciation for all achievements, opportunity for leadership, participation in family decisions, something to control: own room, garage, backyard, dog

Avoids: rest, boredom, playing games he can't win

I have only one child that fits in this category - my oldest. When he was a small child, I would say that he was 'a man in a boy's body' because he loved man's work. This boy was helping put on a very shallow roof at age 6 (tied on with a rope). I have pictures of his working with his daddy at 7 years of age, filling our basement with sand, because we had a leak. He worked side by side happily with his dad all day long. He would work in any type of weather, just so he could work like a man with his dad. I also always said he was 'goal-driven'. He is the boy that worked his way through learning disabilities up to the point where he is in charge of his Cadet corp. This was a major accomplishment and last year he took home five trophies at the year end! Any problem you have - this boy can solve. The more complicated the better! And every one of the strengths on that list are his!

On the other hand, he is also the child/young adult that caused me the most grief and stress with the negative sides. He is a fabulous leader, but he needs to hone his skills, so that he learns to lead his brothers in an honouring way. When he was a small child, I said that God would do great things with Colt, and I firmly believe this. He excels in anything he does, no matter how difficult it is for him, and every adult that knows my son thinks highly of him. As difficult as it is at times to raise a leader, I am intensely proud of who this boy is!

Sanguine - the Popular Personality

The Extrovert / The Talker

Child

STRENGTHS

Daring and eager

Innocent

Inventive and imaginative

Cheerful

Enthusiastic

Fun-loving

Chatters constantly

Bounces back

Energized by people

WEAKNESSES

No follow through

Disorganized

Easily distracted

Short interest span

Emotional ups and downs

Wants credit

Tells fibs

Forgetful

Teen

STRENGTHS

Cheerleader

Charms others

Gets daring

Joins clubs

Popular

Life of the party

Creative

Wants to please

Apologetic

WEAKNESSES

Deceptive

Creative excuses

Easily led astray

Craves attention

Needs peer approval

Con-artist

Won't study

Immature

Gossips

Emotional needs: attention, approval, affection, acceptance, presence of other people and activity

Avoids: dull tasks, routines, criticism, details, lofty goals

Like an otter, a child in this category tends to be very playful, but when annoyed by someone they can strike out with their little paws. But then, when all is said and done, they quickly forget and get back to playing happily with the other person. When Savannah came home it didn't take long for me to say to Dane, "She is so genetically your sister!"

When Dane was 13 years old and 7 year old Austin was annoying him, I suddenly had an epiphany one day. I said, "Dane! Austin is your twin!! He is exactly like you were when you were little!" At this, Dane's annoyance in his little brother turned to pride. Here was a boy 'just like him'! He had to be wonderful!! LOL!!

Well, like Dane and Austin, Savannah is an Otter. When I read this book to Ray, I read each of the weaknesses (the things that were frustrating me) out and was thrilled to realize there was a reason she as: disorganized, easily distracted, had a short attention span, forgetful, and had no follow through. It was because, at the same time as having those weaknesses, she has these strengths: she is happy, loving, forgiving, cheerful, enthusiastic, fun-loving, and goofy.

My Otter boy Dane, doesn't have 'lofty goals' like his big brother does. He wants to enjoy life and not struggle hard through it. He wants to have fun and be Peter Pan. I remember when he was about ten years old, I was sad thinking of losing my Sunshine Boy. He always made me laugh. I would chase him through the house and tackle him and we laughed a lot. He was fun to tease and he never held a grudge. It almost made me cry to think that such a sunny personality was going to go through puberty and become a man and I would lose that happy sunshine and laughter.

Well, God is good, and little did I know at that time, that my 4 year old Austin, was going to be another Otter. I am so happy to have him! He keeps us going with his silly personality, his need for attention, and his beautiful, loving, sweet, endearing personality. He is my encourager: "Mummy, you look beautiful." Even when I am in my pajamas. He doesn't see the mess. He sees what his heart sees. He is my boy with a love of God, and he will tell anyone that listens that God loves them.

Savannah is just like these two boys. She has a flightly, distracted little spirit. A little girl that will take 20 minutes to make her bed, when she could make it in five. But a loving little girl, that when she is sitting on time-out will call to me, "Mummy, I love you so much." She wears her heart on her sleeve and is quick to laugh or cry. And like Dane and Austin, she will strike out like a little otter when someone does something she doesn't like.

So now I have three Otters in my house and I am glad, as it keeps things fun and moving!

PHLEGMATIC - the Peaceful Personality

The Introvert / The Follower

Child

STRENGTHS

Watches others

Easily amused

Little trouble

Dependable

Lovable

Agreeable

WEAKNESSES

Selfish

Teasing

Avoids work

Fearful

Quietly stubborn

Lazy

Retreats to TV

Teen

STRENGTHS

Pleasing personality

Witty

Good listener

Mediates problems

Hides emotions

Leads when pushed

Casual attitude

WEAKNESSES

Quietly stubborn

Indecisive

Unenthusiastic

Too compromising

Unmotivated

Sarcastic

Uninvolved

Procrastinates

Emotional needs: peace and relaxation, attention, praise, self-worth, loving motivation

Avoids: conflicts, confrontation, initiative, decisions, extra work, responsibility, tension, quarrels

I have two little boys that fit in this category and I am *so happy*!!! I always knew that my two littlest boys were sweet and loving and easy to raise, but I had not read this book and charted them before. At the same time, when I was charting the girls, I realized that my husband is so totally this category too!! No wonder his mother said he was such an easy child! And each and every one of these characteristics, both strengths and weaknesses, are my husband!! It makes it so much easier to understand why things are a certain way!

Cooper and Briton are the most loving and sweet children. Both of these children are blessed with such repentant little spirits! The second that they do wrong, they will come to me and remorsefully say to me, "Mummy, I'm sorry." And they mean it. If I correct Cooper for being bossy, big tears well up in his eyes, because he doesn't intend to be bossy. He is just helping someone to do something. And you have read about Briton on my posts. He is just plain adorable. Sorry. The truth must be spoken. *smile*

I do notice though, that he tends to disappear when there is work to be done. Either that or he 'helps' undo the efforts and often I hear Raine calling, "Mum, can you come and get Briton. He is taking out the toys I have put away." When I come upstairs and say, "Briton, have you been bugging Raine?" He turns to her and with big, puppy dog eyes he says, "Wohry, MEsigh," and gives her a big hug.

God surely blessed me when he gave me two Peace loving children in my last set of four!

MELANCHOLY - the Perfect Personality

The Introvert / The Thinker

Child

STRENGTHS

Thinks deeply

Talented

Musical

Fantasizes

True friend

Perfectionist

Intense

Dutiful and responsible

WEAKNESSES

Moody

Whines

Self-conscious

Too sensitive

Hears negatives

Avoids criticism

Sees problems

Won't communicate

Teen

STRENGTHS

Good student

Creative - likes research

Organized and purposeful

High standards

Conscientious and on time

Neat and orderly

Sensitive to others

Sweet spirit

Thrifty

WEAKNESSES

Depressed and withdrawn

Inferiority complex

Inflexible

Suspicious of people

Critical

Negative attitude

Poor self-image

Revengeful

Needs approval

Emotional needs: sensitivity to deep desires, satisfaction from quality achievement, space to call his own, security and stability, separation from noisy, messy siblings, support from parents: "I believe in you."

Avoids: noise, confusion, trivial pursuits, being "jollied"

I have two children that fit into this category: Cassidy and Raine. It all makes sense now! Cassidy has always been a thinker. My mother has always said that he learns through osmosis. He just learns things easily. He is the boy that at age eight was putting together a birthday party for me, complete with balloons, streams, cake, everything he needed. He has been making birthday cakes around here for years. He is a great student - a boy that is a pleasure to teach. He does his work without being nagged.

These lists of characteristics is so in line with how she behaves. I always say that Raine does not have a mean bone in her body. She has a sweet spirit and is very sensitive to other people's feelings. It explains why we struggle with her refusing to communicate at times, or sometimes to make right when she has done wrong.

We also see that she is the one to take time to formulate thoughts, while her sister is so quick to speak. Though her English is 10x better than her sister, she will respond to a thought-provoking question well after her sister has already answered in her broken English.

Raine is an extremely dutiful child: she knows her responsibilities and does them. She doesn't complain when she has to get up early to empty the dishwasher, or has to stop playing because it is time to fold laundry. Her sister, on the other hand, will complain at these things. Raine is the one that when we picked her up was reserved and thoughtful and seems self-conscious.

So how much is adoption related, and how much is simply the personality that God put into them?

I have realized that Raine being a First-Born needs to keep this status. I have told her that she has the privilege of being the firstborn in the younger set of children in our home. When they are outside playing there are four of them, plus Austin. In all honestly, she may be older than Cooper, but we keep her legal age, which makes her younger than him. I have explained to her that God put her as first born in her family in Ethiopia, because he knew she was responsible and a good leader and a fine example to her sister.

I then explained to her that though Cooper is older that her (legally by 9 months), that in actuality, he is a 5th born child, which makes him one of the youngest children in the family. I told her that I thought it was important for her to keep the leadership role that God had given her by putting her as first born in Ethiopia. And I asked her to be a helper while outside playing with the children.

I think it is important to recognize that she is a firstborn and give her responsibilities to match who she is. The difference in personality between her and Cooper is unbelievable. He adores her and they are so sweet together, but at the same time, she is so much more responsible and 'older' than he is.

And Savannah..... Well, she is the indulged younger child. A word-picture of Savannah:

While folding laundry one day:

"Mum, I want go Ethiopia."

I reply (thinking this might be a profound moment), "Why Savannah?"

"In Ethiopia I not work. Here I allllllwayyys fold laundry. And pick up toys when on floor."

Ha ha!

So then I told her that she was a baby in Ethiopia and here she was a big girl. I told her that if she didn't want to work then she could be a baby here: she would have to wear a diaper, lay in her bed and then she could have no work.

She laughed and said, "I work. Me big."

Funny girl! So in character!

And then there is Raine. One day, I had told the kids to bring the pop cans from the sports court. They had taken them there and set up a store. There was a mess and they had to put all the cans in the boxes. I look out the window and what do I see? Raine, all by herself, carrying all six boxes to the house. Where were the boys? On the sports courts, but not moving yet.

Raine - Miss Dutiful and Responsible.

I will continue to over-analyze because I am a parent and that is who I am. And I also want to have well-behaved children! But I will always be willing to try new methods if I am alerted to something from the girls or from a friend in the adoption world, who has some wisdom to share. It is a new day every day and there is so much to learn!

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Sitting on the Edge of the Nest - Part 1

Raising children is a constant evolution of parenting methods - at least for me it is! I am always eager to learn from others and gleaning wherever I go. I am so thankful to have many children. It gives me opportunities to learn from my mistakes and try all over. Sadly, the oldest children didn't get the benefits of my new found 'wisdom'. *smile*

I have really gone back and forth and around the mulberry bush over the issue of: to follow traditional schooling versus following a child's interests. After the first two years of homeschooling, I realized that textbooks were not the route I wanted to go. I was blessed to find the Five In A Row website and that launched our learning from a platform. In that case, the platform was a wonderful children's story that opened doors to learning Applied Maths, Social Studies, Geography, Art, and Science - all while enjoying a story curled up on the couch with my little boys.

From here, I moved onto Ambleside - this was a spin-off of Charlotte Mason's theories of homeschool. She believed in Copywork (where a child copies from great writings and in doing so, learns punctuation, grammar, vocabulary, spelling, and quality writing), Dictation where I would dictate sentences to the child, and they would then write from hearing what I had said. This improved their listening skills, plus all other language arts. Narrations are a wonderful way of the children telling back to me what they remember from the readings, rather than filling in blanks on a test sheet, which simply seems to be written to show what they don't know!

They would read great works of literature and 'Living Books'. I have an amazing list of 1000 books that are a must read. Our children have read a great majority of these wonderful books. I have a passion for books that draw me in and make me feel like I am in the adventure, and I wanted my children to have the same love for books.

We began doing Nature Studies (observing nature and drawing what we saw).


Artist Studies where we studied great works of art were also a staple of our homeschooling days. Yesterday, a friend of our boys was over having dinner and a replica of the Mona Lisa was hanging near the dining room table. One of our sons said to me with absolute amazement, "He didn't know it was the Mona Lisa!" They take it for granted that everyone must know what they know.

I am so appreciative that I have exposed my boys to Degas, Monet, Van Gogh, Picasso and other famous artists! Last year, while in Vancouver, we fell across an art store that sold a whole selection of paintings by famous artists. Of course, they were just replicas, but our boys were thrilled to see paintings that they have duplicated themselves when they were just eight and ten years of age!

Starry Night - Van Gogh
11 year old Colt replica

Pablo Picasso

7 year old rendition

Pablo Picasso - Cubism
12 year old rendition

Edward Degas
10 year old rendition

Vincent Van Gogh
9 year old replica

Mozart, Beethoven, and other classical music are also recognized around our house. There are so many ways to teach a children love of classical music and art, simply by putting it in front of them! There is a wonderful series called Classical Kids. In each CD there is a story written around the music from that famous composer.

Classical music is all around us, and if we have not opened our children's eyes to it, it will stay as background music, but as soon as you have them listen, pay attention and appreciate a piece of music, it suddenly becomes personal. We have been in elevators and stores when our children were quick to identify classical music that they knew.

When one of my children was three years old, and his daddy had been away at work for some time, he and his dad walked past a picture done by Albrecht Durer, and this little one said simply, "Daddy that is Albrecht Durer." My husband had no clue and was amazed his little boy knew such things!

It really wasn't difficult: Put up a painting by an artist, tell them who did it, read to them about this artist to help them *know* him or her, have them reproduce it in a simple manner, and then continue doing the same thing with other works of art. It is a wonderful way to learn!

As the years passed, we continued learning through things that interested the children. This wonderful way of learning continued until the Dreaded Grade 10 Year of Highschool. At this point, I made a mistake. Many will disagree and that is their choice.

During that transitional time of learning I began to do the not so unusual panic. For years we had schooled as we saw fit: never following what the public schools did - learning when we felt that we should learn. Who says you should learn about the solar system in grade 5, simply because the government says that is when it should be taught! I believe in teaching when a child is interested in something! Or letting a child learn to read when he is ready versus because he is 5 years old!

Cassidy (then 11), one day, decided he wanted to create a 'world'. He spent many hours with headphones, plugged into an audio machine, listening to novels on cd, while he papier mached a large piece of cardboard (3'x6') into a rectangular world. It was full of mountains, rivers, lakes. He has now begun painting this world. Noone asked him to do this. He was simply interested in creating something and off he went.

The Beginning of His World

READING: Audio Books

ART: papier mache project construction, and then painting, gluing and creating to bring his world to life!

SCIENCE: how to make volcanoes, rivers, and desert to look real

MATH: mixing the correct ratios of flour and water to make his glue

And then, today, my newly turned 10 year old was given the bread machine. It has sat idle on the shelf for the last three years. No more. This child was given a bread machine cookbook and the machine.

He was told he could try out every recipe in the book! Today, he began with Cheese Filled Pretzels. Sounds yummy!!

During this first lesson of using the bread machine he did the following:

SCIENCE: Learned about yeast and what it does; Identified and found different ingredients, learned to substitute one ingredient that is missing for another that we have.

READING: Choose a recipe; read a cook book.

MATH: Had a long lesson in how many 1/4th are in a cup; how many thirds are in 2/3 etc. Fractions are much better taught through a practical method than simply by seeing abstract numbers on a sheet of paper. And he really didn't even know he was having a math lesson. When I moved on and told him he needed 3/4 tsp of salt, he was able to tell me he needed a 1/2 and a 1/4 tsp to make it up. He didn't know he had just done 1/2+ 1/4 = 3/4 - but he had!


LIFE SKILLS: Creating a recipe, seeing it through, kneading the dough, mixing the filling, using an oven, and then joyfully serving his ever-so-happy to eat family his successful treat!

The Pretzel Maker

So, where did I begin to stop this wonderful way of learning? When my oldest hit the end of Grade 9. I began to fear the future. Would he be equipped for what he needed to enter university? Would I fail him if he did not take every dry subject that the public school felt he needed to learn? And thus began the drudgery and loss of the next three years of a young, excited, inquisitive life.

This was the boy that creating an airplane in our basement when he was 9 years old. It had a wingspan of 14', 3 baby car seats attached to the body, and a running electric propeller! This boy could take any problem and solve it. He doesn't see problems; he sees solutions, and they are always unusual!

A few days ago, he dad asked what was the wire that was extending out of his window up into the air. Our 'Einstein' son (as one son likes to call his brother), replied, "It is my cell phone antenna." And knowing that boy - it worked! How many other kids do you know that scoot around on the roof with wires and wire cutters because they know that if they do this they think they might get phone service where normally there is none?

I wouldn't. I am told 'no service' - I just accept it. Not that boy. He has to prove that he can't come up with a solution before he quits. But the point is - he always looks to solve the problem!

Well, for the last three years, I have seen this boy struggle through traditional school grades 10 - 12. You know, many brilliant people such as, Edison, Einstein, Mozart, Nelson Rockefeller, Walt Disney, Winston Churchill, Tommy Hilfiger, George Washington, Tom Cruise all have/had learning disabilities of one form or another.

I always wonder what would have happened if I had not been so fearful of not doing it the 'right way', and had instead, allowed him to flower how he was intended: inventing things, creating, solving problems, taking things apart. I do firmly believe now, that he would have gone on to do great things. But instead, I let fear take hold and forced my square peg boy into a round hole!

To be continued in Part 2
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Of Mice and Men

Seriously, I have to finally respond to negative comments on homeschool. It almost makes me laugh, while at the same time frustrates me, that people take things I say or photos I post, so literally!! When my son was playing outside with his brother, I got a comment that it looked 'provocative' - like a lynching or a beheading. (I am not speaking to the comments who recognized it as play).

Honestly, my children were playing. Simply boys being boys and doing what boys do best - roughhousing, goofing off, and using their imaginations. Actually, something that sadly has gone by the wayside since TV, video games, Nintendo DS, Playstation, and other electronic gadgets have become the stape of children's imaginative diets.

It is different in our family though, as our children watch little TV; what they do watch is harmless compared to what we know is available on television! Daniel Boone, The Waltons, Little House on the Prairie, and other timeless classics are among favourites.

And then, of course, there are the occasionally more parent-guidance type movies that the older ones watch that are fast-paced and exciting. These are movies that little ones wouldn't be allowed to watch, but these films are viewed with content in mind. They are not intended to exploit the boys' minds, but to enhance learning, such as in: Shooting Dogs - when learning about genocide and Rwanda, or Rabbit Proof Fence -when studying Australia and the "Stolen Generation", or The Children of Huang Chi - the rescue of orphans in wartime China.

Video games, computer games, DS - these are all doled out in very moderate amounts. What our children do with their imaginations mostly comes from good living literature, old TV series, history reads, and other 'normal' avenues. Yes, boys will be boys, (said with a smile!) and they do choose to do some things that I would rather they didn't, as in play army - but if you give a boy a piece of toast he will turn it into a gun! So what can you do?

I am not going to take away my boys masculinity by getting all bent out of shape when they play games that bring out the lion in them. A woman becomes a mama bear when her little ones are in danger; well, a man becomes a lion - or he should - when his family needs protecting. When boys are not allowed to be physical, adrenaline-filled, and play rough, we are risking turning them into boys that won't know how to raise up and fight for their family when the need arises!

Here is an excerpt from the book Wild At Heart by John Eldridge:

Beginning of quote:

The way a man's life unfolds nowadays tends to drive his heart into remote regions of the soul. Endless hours at a computer screen; selling shoes at the mall; meetings, memos, phone calls. The business world - where the majority of American men live and die - requires a man to be efficient and punctual. Corporate policies and procedures are designed with one aim: to harness a man to the plow and make him produce. But the soul refuses to be harnessed; it knows nothing of Day Timers and deadlines and P & L statements. The soul longs for passion, for freedom, for life.

As D.H. Lawrence said, "I am not a mechanism." A man needs to feel the rhythms of the earth; he needs to have a in hand something real - the tiller of a boat, a set of reins, the roughness of rope, or simply a shovel. Can a man live all his days to keep his fingernails clean and trim? Is that what a boy dreams of?

Society at large can't make up its mind about men. Having spent the last thirty years redefining masculinity into something more sensitive, safe, manageable, and, well, feminine, it now berates men for not being men. Boys will be boys, they sigh, as though if a man were to truly grow up he would forsake wilderness and wanderlust and settle down, to be at home forever in Aunt Polly's parlour.

"Where are all the real men?" is regular fare for talk shows and new books. You asked them to be women, I want to say. (bold emphasis mine) The result is a gender confusion never experienced at such wide level in the history of the world. How can a man know he is one when his highest aim is minding his manners?

End of quote:

I am thrilled to know that my boys are real boys. They know how to use chainsaws, skilsaws, build foundations and frame houses, hang drywall, are training to jump out of airplanes, can cut down trees and buck it for firewod, rappel down cliffs, and yes, use guns and bows and arrows!

I am proud to be the mother of six young men! Young men who at the same time as being encouraged to be warriors, are being taught how to cook and clean, take care of babies and children, to open doors for ladies, help them with their coats, offer their seats to older people, and protect women. In other words, be chivalrous!
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Homeschool Highschool

My sister emailed me one day and asked me how school was going with Dane. A post I have not yet had time to write was about how I have decided to listen to their interests, instead of jamming down their throats what *I* think they need to know. That will be a hot topic when I finally have time to write it.

In the meanwhile, as I was receiving my sister's email, I happened to look outside and this is what I saw. Dane had Cassidy tied to a tree and the girls were in absolute delight at such a funny thing! They are so used to seeing their big brother tied (figuratively) to a desk, and to see him do such a silly thing was highly amusing to them.

I told my sister that he was probably doing some kind of physics lesson or something! *grin*

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Another Reason to Homeschool

When you homeschool you can wear what you want to school. No uniforms, no concern with what other students think of your clothes, no expensive trends to keep up with....

You can even create your own 'odd' fashions. I suppose 'odd' is all relative, though! Here Cassidy is wearing a Home Economics uniform. Do *not* ask me what he is being or wearing, as I haven't the foggiest!

But he is certainly exercising his imagination and creativity! *grin*

MUM!!!

(He knows his photo destination is the blog *grin*)
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Regarding Comments

I just wanted to say thank you for the very kind comments that I have received either privately or through my blog. They always encourage me to continue writing.

I do the blog specifically as a memory book for my children, and secondly, because I love to keep in touch with our close friends and family, and that is there way of keeping up with us, and third, but also important to me, to encourage other families who have, or might be intending on adopting older children from Ethiopia. If it weren't for the third reason, I would take my blog private.

The thing I love about the blogging world (if you are careful in how your write) is the anonymity of it. What I have found is that normally either people I know personally read the blog, or absolute strangers who can't 'see into our backyard'. There is safety in that, as I make a point of not giving hints as to where we live.

I do want to caution one thing, though. I am sorry to say that if you leave a comment that makes any reference to where we live, or if your comment links people back to your blog and you live in our town, (and you have made reference to where we live), then I am sorry, but I won't be able to publish your comment. My childrens' safety and our families privacy is too important to me.

Oh, and one other thing, while I am being particular *smile*, please feel free to leave your name if you are commenting, as you know me, and I would like to know who is leaving comments on my blog.

I hope you will understand this.

Blessings, Justine
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Easter Sunday

Today we went to the church near our home. The girls dressed up in their spring dresses and white shoes, and the boys looked handsome in their dress shirts and good jeans. The church was absolutely packed! We had to slip up to the front of the church, and I had all the little ones sit on the floor, while we older ones shared a piece of a pew.

I am glad that we ended up at the front (cause usually we sit in the middle) because it was a wonderful service!! They had brought in live animals and there were two little goats and one little lamb! The children thought they were wonderful. The pastor used the animals to talk to us about the meaning of Passover and the Scape Goat.

Then our girls were offered flags to 'flag dance'. These small flags are held by the girls and they dance around and wave their flags to the music. At first the girls said no, and then Little Miss Savannah - decided she wanted to have a flag. Raine took Savannah over to the girl and they walked clear across the front of the church to get a flag from the box.

You should have seen Savannah beaming with shy pleasure, as she danced her flag around in the air to the music. I kind of figured that Raine wanted to do it but was a bit shy to, so I asked her if she wanted to. She said no, but I am happy to say that I am really getting to know their hidden personalities, and I was sure she was just being shy. So I told her that she didn't need to feel that way; it was okay to do whatever she wanted to worship. At this point, she decided that she wanted one. She slipped quietly across the front of the church, selected a white gauze flag and proceeded to quietly wave it in the air in time to the music. I wish I had my camera because with their pretty aqua, yellow and white dresses, waving flags, they looked very sweet.

After the music got quite lively, you should have seen Savannah! She was bouncing up and down to the music - feet leaving the floor, clapping her hands. It was wonderful to see! I always see her at our other church kind of swaying to the music and clapping but holding back. Here there were so many young people up clapping and dancing that it encouraged her to set herself free!
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More Hair, More Styles

Raine loves it when I do her hair. The day I was able to do tiny braids at the front of her head was a joyful one for her. We were able to braid tiny braids and add a bead and a snap.

Then one day I decided I would try french braiding backwards. I turned her towards me and then grasped her hair and began braiding. I began at the front and braided towards the top of her head. It actually worked and turned out very pretty. She looked like a little ballerina.



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Resurrection Sunday

We have a wonderful tradition that we do at Easter. First of all, we watch a child's version of the crucifixion and the resurrection.

On Friday night we watched the Nest Family trilogy of the life of Jesus, followed by the crucifixion, and then the resurrection. Because our children know the celebratory meaning of Easter, I was planning on showing the resurrection video on Sunday - the actual day of resurrection. Plans changed though as I observed the girls watching the video. They had seen the crucifixion video in a child's format while in Ethiopia, so they were fully aware of what Jesus and God and Jesus's dying on the cross meant.

But it had probably been a year since they had seen the video. So during the video I spent more time observing them than I did watching the video. It was interesting to see how they would respond to this story. At one point I saw a shine in Savannah's eye and then she turned to look at me. I asked her if she was sad. She nodded her head and I put out my arms and she came and sat on my lap, while sadly sobbing at Jesus's death.

At that moment, I decided we needed to put on the triumphant movie of his Resurrection. She watched that one with joy on her face. I saw Raine mouthing something from across the room. I stopped the video to ask her what she was saying. She was watching the video and saying, "He has no more owies!" She had a look of pleasure and wonder on her face.

We take it for granted because our children have been raised in the faith and simply *know* that Jesus rose again, and therefore they have no sadness at his death. But this was different! The girls now have an understanding that has been addressed and they have seen it to a happy ending.

The following day we did our Resurrection Rolls. This is a wonderful fun time. We have been doing this since Colt and Dane were small. They are yummy and represent what happened at Easter. This is the recipe:

Crescent roll dough
Melted butter
Large marshmallows
Cinnamon
Sugar

1 - Preheat oven to 350*

2- Give each child a triangle of crescent rolls.
The crescent roll represents the cloth that Jesus was wrapped in.

3- Give each child a marshmallow.
This represents Jesus.

4- Have the children dip the marshmallows in melted butter.
This represents the oils of embalming.

5- Then dip the buttered marshmallow in the cinnamon and sugar.
This represents the spices used to anoint the body.

6- Then wrap up the coated marshmallow tightly in the crescent roll. Not a typical crescent wrap. Bring the sides up and seal the marshmallow inside.
This represents the wrapping of Jesus' body after death.

7- Place in a 350* oven for 10-12 minutes.
The oven represents the tomb- pretend it was three days.

8- When the rolls have cooled slightly, the children can open their rolls (cloth) and discover that Jesus is no longer there. HE IS RISEN!

Ray came home with the crescent rolls and he held it up to show me. I asked him how many the tube made.

"Eight," he said.

"Eight," I said, "That might not be enough. "

He then smiled big and held up FOUR tubes.

I laughed and said, "You are learning!! LOL!" He has learned that when I send him shopping for something on sale - you buy LOTS!

Making the Rolls

The Uncooked Resurrection Rolls

Jesus "Leaving the Tomb"!

He's Gone!

The Empty Tomb

Munching Down

These are so yummy that we had to make four tubes and everyone got three treats. They are like cinnamon rolls, but smaller.
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